SILENCE MODE

Silence Mode


Am I really that important that I need to carry around a phone. Are the people in my life important enough that I need to call them while going through a drive through? "Hey could you hold on a minute, I need to order a #9, cheese only. Sorry about that.....I didn't think I would get through the line that quickly. I can't believe how good the Coke tastes from McDonald's. I wish you were here so we could enjoy it together. So when are you coming to see me?"

You know how the rest of the conversation usually goes - two lonely people discussing mostly meaningless details so they don't really have to concentrate on things that truly matter in life.

Imagine how different the world would be if we spent our time encouraging others for real - not patronizing remarks that only add to the subtle self defeating thoughts that most people deal with anyway, but real authentic praise for something you admire in someone else either because you don't have it or because you do have it and you know how difficult it is to maintain.

I recently experienced this on a bus trip home from a camping trip with about 12 single adults. I was the only married person on the bus. The group was rather diverse and I used to be responsible for the group's spiritual growth. I was invited to go, but I really wanted to stay home that weekend with my family, but my wife said that she would be fine with the boys at home and that I should go...so I did.

We left on a Sunday afternoon, drove 5 hours, stayed one night and drove home in about 7 hours. It was on the way home that I experienced what it meant to genuinely and publically admire something about another individual and have them reciprocate the same courtesy. The crazy part about the "game" was that it was initiated by a visitor to the group. The group was a Christian group and she was a visiting atheist brought by someone who was concerned for her soul.

When the game started, it was so awkward listening to people tell one another good things about one another. In fact, no one was even looking at the person who was giving the compliment. Our society is so not used to hearing someone praise them that we didn't know how to react. As time went on, it became evident to me that our lives should be filled trying to catch people doing something good.

I happen to be the keeper of the cell phones during the game. When the game started everyone turned off their phones, gave them to me to put on the cell phone chair and focused on the people in the bus. No phone calls were accepted for any reason. I witnessed 13 people gladly give up a possible conversation and engage in meaningful conversation that I will never forget for as long as I live. It lasted over 3 hours. Unbelievable!

The experience recaptured my conviction that I need to do more encouraging and quite frankly, I need more encouragement. It feels good to know you are loved. Make someone feel good today!